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ASK MAX

June 9, 2005 Edition

Dear Max:

I am curious about how long it takes before “old Roll” is ready to apply? And do you prefer the dead rodents or birds or fish?

Nika Marie

Hi Nika Marie,

An old roll? How stale? If it can be chewed…I say go for it. Apply your mouth to it now. As to part 2 of your question…I’ve had my snout in a lot of bags of garbage. Rat bones taste too much like street and fish is too easy to detect on my breath. Bird bones are a choking hazard. Stick with meaty bits, fat strips, and anything with butter on it.

Dear Max:

I’m a nine year old Labrador/Rhodesian Ridgeback. Why do my masters have 85 different names for me? …can’t they remember? And don’t you think the term “good boy” is a little condescending? Who they callin boy?? arf.

Johan

Dear Johan,

Don’t get me started! I get called “Little Man,” “Big Man,” “Handsome Man,” “Baby Man,” “Monkey Man,” “Elvin King,” “Mad Max Beyond Funderdome…” I tried to solve this by getting a drivers license. Then it would be right there! My name is MAX. See? But I could never parallel park.

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